To, The Listener:
Dear You,
To start off with this exposition
I refuse to attempt to be didactic or super spiritual, flaky, or religious
By any means, type, sort, or function
Because I'm lacking the vernacular to adequately capture
His immaculate stature, and His love for Mary Magdalene
But still i grab this torch, and use His word like a lit match
And then attempt, to make an accurate depiction of His Majesty...
But let's go back a bit
So I can relate, and expose my heart's true conditions
My marriage to the soul killer, eloping with Religion
I practiced righteousness with consistency in being didactic
But convinced the lost and hurting to go play in some bad traffic
I've received knowledge from Gnostic's
And gotten Words of Wisdom from Prophets
But lived my natural life as a spiritual armature - equivalent to a novice
Shaken hands with dope dealers
While striking pose's in the club
Making out with chicks i just met - that were lit off prescription drugs
Was listless towards the Body of Believers
And hated Christianity
Breathing threats of disdainment
Poking fun and using profanity
Ready to put my father in the hospital
For mistreating my entire immediate family
For trying trying to hurt my mother
I've blocked out everything that he's saying to me
I've licked my lips to the satisfaction
Off of women in scantily clad clothing
Nude women from just right to plus size
Images lead me to self groping
Was hurt by the lies my Pastor told me
More specifically, what he didn't say
I blamed him for the fact that i had gone astray
I've been woken up by demon spirits
Holding my body down like a shell of a man in a casket
Hand over my mouth like a tight mask - it's
So hard to breath, and my heart would pump feverishly drastic
And the laughter of this lame called 'shame'
Would haunt me for days after the arrest
Had never met him, but i knew him before he came
My identity has been a misconstrued - dismantled - overly trampled version
Of a zombie type emotionless - disgruntled dangerous, cage-less animal
I've boiled over more times than a neglected tea kettle
And popped off like Latifa in the 'set it off girls' while winning a gold metal
Justified my actions while using the excuse of being practical and pragmatic
But been a stench in the nostrils of God giving the aroma of bad cabbage
Wasted money on things that i can't even tell where they are
Having to scrap my life up off the ground after being run over by a car
I've question every relationship that I've ever possibly had
Including the most prolific one - between the Father God - i call Him dad
And He used to call me son
Until I was seduced by His antagonist
I married His arch rival
Having intercourse with all her lavishes
Her tone of being prone to invincibility
And freedom from being vulnerable
Was tempting enough for me to pack my stuff up
Saying 'I'm going home with you!'
She called me away from leadership
Showing me that I didn't need any spiritual guidance
That I could trust her knowledge of self - and she would be my protector, my provider
Taught me how to be didactic and polished
Introduced me unknown tongues
Told me I'll never let you go my love
So on her truth I hung
She confirmed my hearts cries and justified my insecurities
And helped me hide my true nature, selling a definite cure for me
Blinded me to immutable facts about the origin of beauty, goodness, the Nature of God's Love, the truth's that operating outside of what the church walls does
I was dependent on her, and followed her hip twist like a home sick puppy
But end the end, it was God's saving power that only allowed her to cut me
Trust me, she was going for the kill like the bride pursued bill
And hit pressure points on my judgment until i fell down ill
And the pain of defeat and betrayal lied adjacent to my bed
As she walked back and forth over my still body not sure if i was dead
In my comatose, i was spiritually gritting my teeth
While gripping the sheets
At a loss for reality
Daily and nightly
I couldn't sleep
I tossed and tumbled
Would rise and mumble
Like driving through a jungle on speed
Listening to Cambria and Coheed
But then God spoke a promise of trust...
It was Jesus or bust
And i was exhausted from the play fighting like Knuck if you Buck
And with everything in me, i got up in various apparel and strangled my enemy
Mangled her face like a thousand bee stings or poisonous sea anemone
I beat religion with the only weapon i use that's partnered with love
It's hard like a fierce shove but gentle a white dove
It's trust....
Truly and terrific
Top of the line
Terror to top dog's with dollars signs
Is the truth of the time
That's toppling over the subconscious mind
Take caution, and timidly
Think before you take immediate action
'Cause truth tip-toe's on the tomb
The entrance to your hearts tavern
Revolutionarly rigorous
Right when you needed a raunchy reading
A rope-a-dope with Paul Oakenfold
That's telling you to slow your role preceding
Readily respective
Running the course
Regardless of what your used to too
Is this group of 'really rough and tough guys'
That's bringing you the good news!
Unconstrained from undermining
The untold stories of the ubiquitous
While unrelenting to understand this unity
Hoping that you get with this
Uncontrollable chaos
Mixed with unfailing love
Understood stance of your position
With the Lord in the Heavens up above
Stories of laughter,
And stepping stones to serious divine interventions
Saying I love you again
Being unhindered by various scripture mentions
A sap to swell love songs
Circling the circumference of the Son of Man
Setting your seat sideways and saddled up
Soaking up on the Sabbath again
Telling all tales topical
Relating to those in tip top shape
To turn around for once
And seek to give with nothing to take
No longer tribal over trivial matters
Tripping over stumbling block
'Cause my hearts been tattooed in Tatuine
Traveling to His lot and then stopped
So I invite you in formally, to divorce any form or shred religion
And come into a place of Glory
That you prayed to raise your kids in
Forget about our talents
Forget about us
And look past the music
Seek to have trust
Yours Truly,
.........
.briefing.
- Marcus C. Hollinger
- This is my formal and yet informal writing hub, that I use to express all of my feelings and thoughts from my past life to my life currently. I write part time but I plan to be as consistent as possible to publish my poems and short writings here for you all.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Sunday, July 10, 2011
.f.aith.
not faith in my abilities
but faith in a divine artillery
with infinite solutions that complement the author
and prove to be conducive
from start to finish
only the recipient of the Godly premonition
can correctly circumvent the snares and the fires
of always being lonely
it's the belief in the unseen
and yet the hope that it's incarnate
tangible evidence might be voided
but its mildly circumstance - hardly
peace be unto the man who rejects vanity: trying to save face
he walks to un-grieve the creator, and seeks to please with faith
.s.incere.
Fall of 2008
but faith in a divine artillery
with infinite solutions that complement the author
and prove to be conducive
from start to finish
only the recipient of the Godly premonition
can correctly circumvent the snares and the fires
of always being lonely
it's the belief in the unseen
and yet the hope that it's incarnate
tangible evidence might be voided
but its mildly circumstance - hardly
peace be unto the man who rejects vanity: trying to save face
he walks to un-grieve the creator, and seeks to please with faith
.s.incere.
Fall of 2008
the Cool (part 4)
Because this 'cool' is now over
'Thus sayeth the Lord of Hosts'
Your past doesn't define your future
So murder - by gones be by gones
Let it go - Let it breathe - Let it sing
Let me in and let it be
Let my spirit in for keeps
And let not your heart be -
Troubled - for I am with you
Always stand firm to this truth - Doubled
When your facing challenges
Know I let them in for the growth of your character
And I'm preparing for you a help-meet
And you're gonna ask to marry her.
But I need your heart first
Only I can quench your thirst
So remain steadfast -
Even when your heart wants to burst!
Become my bride to be
When you shed tears, cry for me
And I will see, and I will keep every appearance
cause you - I will seek.
========
O Father - reconcile my differences
And teach me how to speak
'Cause every time! I need your matchless touch
Without you - it's just so hard to breathe.
And you're so good, timeless, affectionate and unfading
To be in the embrace of Jesus Christ - This body I'm abating
Lessening the physical
To meet you in the skies
And lavish on your loving kindness - wrapped in a spiritual high
Where you complete my life's purpose
I stand before you in a robe
A wedding cape you made for me
Making me a star in your show
Prepared to worship and selected to shabback and praise
Was this man in my position
And I give you the rest of my days
I love you like no other
You're a true husband - Rabbi
And a mother...
And with my eyes closed in your presence
I'm taken abstract display of various colors.
------
That form a rainbow
Not suitable for most
But you formed it as an symbol of agreement
That we'll always be close
---
Never again will I part ways or decide double-minded
'Cause I share the Love of the Father - And I can't hide it!
I'll learn how to be wed in the natural Father - to a woman
And forever we'll be joined to you - with no worries of plummet.
---
But let our praise be like drumming!
And the clashing of symbols -
Electric guitars over organ solos
Mixed with brass-pipes and Steinway piano
With the joyful ring of harmonica
And MPC break beats
And wood blocks and tambourines
Make praises as we holler and sing!
Let foot stomping and hand clapping
And African style dances
With burnt offerings and burning incense
Stir up your nostrils Champion!
Let ukulele and violins partnered by harps in your orchestra pit
Make you jump off your throne in response
When you hear your worship lit!
May my drum kit, keyboard,and beat-boxing by mouth -
Create the holy sounds of honor
That are yours without a doubt.
.thank you King of Glory.
.the body of Christ.
genuine yet regarded as impostors
known yet regarded as unknown
dying and yet we live on
beaten yet not killed
sorrowful yet always rejoicing
being poor yet making many rich
====
having nothing....
and yet possessing everything....
.Marcus. .Christopher. .Hollinger.
2007-2009
'Thus sayeth the Lord of Hosts'
Your past doesn't define your future
So murder - by gones be by gones
Let it go - Let it breathe - Let it sing
Let me in and let it be
Let my spirit in for keeps
And let not your heart be -
Troubled - for I am with you
Always stand firm to this truth - Doubled
When your facing challenges
Know I let them in for the growth of your character
And I'm preparing for you a help-meet
And you're gonna ask to marry her.
But I need your heart first
Only I can quench your thirst
So remain steadfast -
Even when your heart wants to burst!
Become my bride to be
When you shed tears, cry for me
And I will see, and I will keep every appearance
cause you - I will seek.
========
O Father - reconcile my differences
And teach me how to speak
'Cause every time! I need your matchless touch
Without you - it's just so hard to breathe.
And you're so good, timeless, affectionate and unfading
To be in the embrace of Jesus Christ - This body I'm abating
Lessening the physical
To meet you in the skies
And lavish on your loving kindness - wrapped in a spiritual high
Where you complete my life's purpose
I stand before you in a robe
A wedding cape you made for me
Making me a star in your show
Prepared to worship and selected to shabback and praise
Was this man in my position
And I give you the rest of my days
I love you like no other
You're a true husband - Rabbi
And a mother...
And with my eyes closed in your presence
I'm taken abstract display of various colors.
------
That form a rainbow
Not suitable for most
But you formed it as an symbol of agreement
That we'll always be close
---
Never again will I part ways or decide double-minded
'Cause I share the Love of the Father - And I can't hide it!
I'll learn how to be wed in the natural Father - to a woman
And forever we'll be joined to you - with no worries of plummet.
---
But let our praise be like drumming!
And the clashing of symbols -
Electric guitars over organ solos
Mixed with brass-pipes and Steinway piano
With the joyful ring of harmonica
And MPC break beats
And wood blocks and tambourines
Make praises as we holler and sing!
Let foot stomping and hand clapping
And African style dances
With burnt offerings and burning incense
Stir up your nostrils Champion!
Let ukulele and violins partnered by harps in your orchestra pit
Make you jump off your throne in response
When you hear your worship lit!
May my drum kit, keyboard,and beat-boxing by mouth -
Create the holy sounds of honor
That are yours without a doubt.
.thank you King of Glory.
.the body of Christ.
genuine yet regarded as impostors
known yet regarded as unknown
dying and yet we live on
beaten yet not killed
sorrowful yet always rejoicing
being poor yet making many rich
====
having nothing....
and yet possessing everything....
.Marcus. .Christopher. .Hollinger.
2007-2009
the Cool (part 3)
Upon receiving what I was given
Came a practical test
The thoughts were provoked
Causing reason to undress - the state of mind
To use these creative lines to kick push glory and honor
Minus the no skating signs.
-
The black cloud that followed
Continually perplexed me and warranted and Exodus from this heat
He who reigns - allowed this test
The battling, the purging, the rightstandable mess
But the flesh said to second guess
Create reason in your own way of thinking
You can justify drinking
-
You can chill in the furnace of lust - must - and bust-downs
Clandestine motives inside a mask - can't trust clowns.
-
But I was one of them - with a lock-down on feeling's
Mad when one stepped too close and closed on dealings
Plus an injury to pride - letting the enemy inside
Wondering and asking - where's my refuge to reside?
======
Sick of turning admonishment to envious actions
B-Boy climaxin'
A strong satisfaction -
Holding the book of the law
And the key to deliverance
I might as well have been in active -
Insignificant.
So these dreams become sappy
Over-lapping my satisfaction
Always taking me to way back when
I was laughing -
Enjoying the constant presence of people
Being too familiar with this scene - gesture were lethal
-
Every pupil was a lie to my heart
So any friendship was "Kurtains!"
Reminiscing of Bogart
-
Malicious maerial violence
And this conventional silence
-i walked with-
Transcended a theoretical science
More than science fiction
I kept my clients fenced in
Using puppet shows to gain my attention
Yet disabling the lights and microphones
Leading to a self-inflicted lynching.
-
Because i didn't wanna live anymore...
And who would batted an eye - upon my outro.
But I bet If I was trendy enough -
You would have let me sport the gaucho's
Even if I was in the game
What would our hearts be saying?
Would it hold the harvest of the fruits of the spirit?
Or would you still just be playing?
Would we still be wearing masks
- I wonder -
Say if I was passed on
Or would a change happen that would finally turn the 'LIVE' - (life or light) on?
And so in a rut a sat complacent
And ruled by an illusion
Were thoughts and motives seemed to cause constant contusions.
Not even a piped dream to spare - just cold brisk pristine air...
======
"But then a hand came from heaven
and knocked me off my ride
And spoke the word of second chance
if I would only abide
-
I couldn't see it but I tried
I was broken down, so I cried
He exposed me to ME
And there wudn't no where to hide
-
He said 'I blinded you for a reason
Now your vision is mine
It will happen in my season
I hold the sands of time
-
I wrote your first rhyme
I gave you the gift to sing
I spoke to word you're preaching
I brought the anointing
-
Now i command you to stand...
My strength is in you...
You will remember why you started and continued...'"
Came a practical test
The thoughts were provoked
Causing reason to undress - the state of mind
To use these creative lines to kick push glory and honor
Minus the no skating signs.
-
The black cloud that followed
Continually perplexed me and warranted and Exodus from this heat
He who reigns - allowed this test
The battling, the purging, the rightstandable mess
But the flesh said to second guess
Create reason in your own way of thinking
You can justify drinking
-
You can chill in the furnace of lust - must - and bust-downs
Clandestine motives inside a mask - can't trust clowns.
-
But I was one of them - with a lock-down on feeling's
Mad when one stepped too close and closed on dealings
Plus an injury to pride - letting the enemy inside
Wondering and asking - where's my refuge to reside?
======
Sick of turning admonishment to envious actions
B-Boy climaxin'
A strong satisfaction -
Holding the book of the law
And the key to deliverance
I might as well have been in active -
Insignificant.
So these dreams become sappy
Over-lapping my satisfaction
Always taking me to way back when
I was laughing -
Enjoying the constant presence of people
Being too familiar with this scene - gesture were lethal
-
Every pupil was a lie to my heart
So any friendship was "Kurtains!"
Reminiscing of Bogart
-
Malicious maerial violence
And this conventional silence
-i walked with-
Transcended a theoretical science
More than science fiction
I kept my clients fenced in
Using puppet shows to gain my attention
Yet disabling the lights and microphones
Leading to a self-inflicted lynching.
-
Because i didn't wanna live anymore...
And who would batted an eye - upon my outro.
But I bet If I was trendy enough -
You would have let me sport the gaucho's
Even if I was in the game
What would our hearts be saying?
Would it hold the harvest of the fruits of the spirit?
Or would you still just be playing?
Would we still be wearing masks
- I wonder -
Say if I was passed on
Or would a change happen that would finally turn the 'LIVE' - (life or light) on?
And so in a rut a sat complacent
And ruled by an illusion
Were thoughts and motives seemed to cause constant contusions.
Not even a piped dream to spare - just cold brisk pristine air...
======
"But then a hand came from heaven
and knocked me off my ride
And spoke the word of second chance
if I would only abide
-
I couldn't see it but I tried
I was broken down, so I cried
He exposed me to ME
And there wudn't no where to hide
-
He said 'I blinded you for a reason
Now your vision is mine
It will happen in my season
I hold the sands of time
-
I wrote your first rhyme
I gave you the gift to sing
I spoke to word you're preaching
I brought the anointing
-
Now i command you to stand...
My strength is in you...
You will remember why you started and continued...'"
the Cool (part 2)
So out of adherence and admonishment
Passed down from the Father
I strengthened my heart
And trained my mouth to follow.
The after works of the Disciples
Paul and peter to be exact
Finishing the book of Acts
And becoming disciplined and apt.
It's all too familiar - when i recollect and think back
Of the passages and sermons I listened to, but didn't pack
Any words of wisdom and courage and patience and obedience
Characteristics of a disciple - but portraying to be a comedian.
Comical because in the spot-light
I tried my derndess to convey righteous activity
But in the trials and tests I needed to pass
I proved only to be in captivity.
Never too much heartfelt training
Yet trying really hard to be His best
Condoning my conception of love
Leading to a spiritual cardiac arrest
No understanding of who I am
Where I was
Or what I'm called to be
Being fermented and scrubbed to showmanship
To ultimately preach - the breach of my normal brain tones
Soiled with slave moans
And degradation of the fruits of the spirit
No pain - No gain - No more.
But you said recently to stop crying
Stop flying - Stop denying
Stop false claiming supplying
Stop contemptuously underlying
STOP TRYING!
Now is the training process that will never cease to diminish or end
Training me - in the here and now on how to be a winner again.
And so from the admonishment
In reality 'iman adherent
I'm blessed by the favor
I 'HAVE' been given clearance.
To be a student to the heavenly Rabbi
Who gave His life for misfits
Since He died for you
Why not live for Him?
And recite His words with no difference
That's why a disciple is trained - in the scholarly Orthodox Doctrinal Traditions
So we can become disciplined through Christ
With the discernment of what to raise kids in.
.No Doubt.
2007-2009
Passed down from the Father
I strengthened my heart
And trained my mouth to follow.
The after works of the Disciples
Paul and peter to be exact
Finishing the book of Acts
And becoming disciplined and apt.
It's all too familiar - when i recollect and think back
Of the passages and sermons I listened to, but didn't pack
Any words of wisdom and courage and patience and obedience
Characteristics of a disciple - but portraying to be a comedian.
Comical because in the spot-light
I tried my derndess to convey righteous activity
But in the trials and tests I needed to pass
I proved only to be in captivity.
Never too much heartfelt training
Yet trying really hard to be His best
Condoning my conception of love
Leading to a spiritual cardiac arrest
No understanding of who I am
Where I was
Or what I'm called to be
Being fermented and scrubbed to showmanship
To ultimately preach - the breach of my normal brain tones
Soiled with slave moans
And degradation of the fruits of the spirit
No pain - No gain - No more.
But you said recently to stop crying
Stop flying - Stop denying
Stop false claiming supplying
Stop contemptuously underlying
STOP TRYING!
Now is the training process that will never cease to diminish or end
Training me - in the here and now on how to be a winner again.
And so from the admonishment
In reality 'iman adherent
I'm blessed by the favor
I 'HAVE' been given clearance.
To be a student to the heavenly Rabbi
Who gave His life for misfits
Since He died for you
Why not live for Him?
And recite His words with no difference
That's why a disciple is trained - in the scholarly Orthodox Doctrinal Traditions
So we can become disciplined through Christ
With the discernment of what to raise kids in.
.No Doubt.
2007-2009
the Cool (part 1)
Of course it's just a portion if my normal frame of evolution
Cause contusions to an envious, lust propelled - contaminated illusion
OF a foul mind, interested only in a fallacy
That over time develops in a monumental cavity.
So shall it appease you to know,
That in mind - body - and soul
That I'm likely to warrant you to question which direction
I choose for a road?
I know I have - cause I knew not the direction to ply my fields
Which landmass or plantation would grow,
By the shedding if tears.
No storybook end - Hansel and Gretel
Or Canterbury Tales -
Beowulf and Grendel
Or sorcerers casting spells /
To free or reform a change and give a new name
By pulling a sword from a stone
Having the most honorable pain.
But the prelude to this story
Starts defying the natural laws of reason and sense
So 'the cool' im leaving to get
The final stage of this cleaning -
My reason to quit - (this)
*making of my master plan*
*developing a disastrous man*
*and though the problems come faster -
I'm hungering after -
His spirit which brings the laughter again.*
.s.incere.
2007-2009
Cause contusions to an envious, lust propelled - contaminated illusion
OF a foul mind, interested only in a fallacy
That over time develops in a monumental cavity.
So shall it appease you to know,
That in mind - body - and soul
That I'm likely to warrant you to question which direction
I choose for a road?
I know I have - cause I knew not the direction to ply my fields
Which landmass or plantation would grow,
By the shedding if tears.
No storybook end - Hansel and Gretel
Or Canterbury Tales -
Beowulf and Grendel
Or sorcerers casting spells /
To free or reform a change and give a new name
By pulling a sword from a stone
Having the most honorable pain.
But the prelude to this story
Starts defying the natural laws of reason and sense
So 'the cool' im leaving to get
The final stage of this cleaning -
My reason to quit - (this)
*making of my master plan*
*developing a disastrous man*
*and though the problems come faster -
I'm hungering after -
His spirit which brings the laughter again.*
.s.incere.
2007-2009
A Ceremony to my Wife (original)
(1) and as the flower unfolds - im stunned in awe of the silhouette of God's spirit and i wanna get near it
geared up - panting - hands sweating - heart thumping to the drum loop, without regrets and I
circumvent my sinful nature and submit to understanding - a reprimanding act to what might jeopardize our holy dancing / and yet we're chanting a new song to the Lord of Hosts / here we can win!
here we close out other people's stereotypes and embrace each other for the love - not the hype
not for gaining attention for the eyes of human beings / but for Holy matrimony the agreement of the evening
the bond for all eternity - with her I'm not adjourned see - cause she's blessed with the gifts of the one maternally
the breeding ground of life and the nurturer of my descendants / my child's first teacher and to my heart she's the winner
(2) I've seen some cold nights and rainy days - and now I have the chance to praise He who gave me you - and I'll sing for you and He for the rest of my remaining days
and I do it with purpose - so the wells of my spirit erupt and wash over this surface
spilling out to your shore line - replenishing the earth - and making your favorite scent - im your frankincense your murr
but when i entice - im free from the lust of the past - I bring you a clean offering, and for our lifetime - it lasts
Resilient to any attacks, so to the snares we laugh - cause our reinforcement is an unseen force that always watches our back
And with the fruits of the spirit, we're given each other's heart to mend one another - the triumph can you hear it?
Can you hear the trumpets blow! and shouts of excitement - the Father Face it glows!
Pleased with our coming together for this appointed time today - we shed tears at this alter - which to each other, is how we pray.
(3) so truly i have to say that im financially sound from jade
an ambassador to Dr. 'YEH' (yahweh), so I shabback and give God the praise!
dance like nobody's watching, and begin your declarations
grab your flags and wave them - running - a walking decoration
release to me your will and emotions - and loose yourself with I
follow me to the rivers of life - the streams that justify
let the flame for me burn uncontrollably - because the actions thereafter now are holy
my rib joined back to guard my heart to stay - only one climax to our story
our kisses will be unexplainable, for when we meet - we're lost and yet we are found
beautiful in every place that I've seeked - and I know what i found
heartfelt is only a small way to explain my longing - innermost
cause until now - I've longed for you to be back - back to your home.
let the ember of our souls - relax and roll
and turn both our hearts - into diamonds, rubies, and gold.
come!
O' lovely serene and good hearted virtuous help-meet
and stand by my side - completed - as the finished product to Jehovah-Nissi.
.s.incere.
Early 2009
geared up - panting - hands sweating - heart thumping to the drum loop, without regrets and I
circumvent my sinful nature and submit to understanding - a reprimanding act to what might jeopardize our holy dancing / and yet we're chanting a new song to the Lord of Hosts / here we can win!
here we close out other people's stereotypes and embrace each other for the love - not the hype
not for gaining attention for the eyes of human beings / but for Holy matrimony the agreement of the evening
the bond for all eternity - with her I'm not adjourned see - cause she's blessed with the gifts of the one maternally
the breeding ground of life and the nurturer of my descendants / my child's first teacher and to my heart she's the winner
(2) I've seen some cold nights and rainy days - and now I have the chance to praise He who gave me you - and I'll sing for you and He for the rest of my remaining days
and I do it with purpose - so the wells of my spirit erupt and wash over this surface
spilling out to your shore line - replenishing the earth - and making your favorite scent - im your frankincense your murr
but when i entice - im free from the lust of the past - I bring you a clean offering, and for our lifetime - it lasts
Resilient to any attacks, so to the snares we laugh - cause our reinforcement is an unseen force that always watches our back
And with the fruits of the spirit, we're given each other's heart to mend one another - the triumph can you hear it?
Can you hear the trumpets blow! and shouts of excitement - the Father Face it glows!
Pleased with our coming together for this appointed time today - we shed tears at this alter - which to each other, is how we pray.
(3) so truly i have to say that im financially sound from jade
an ambassador to Dr. 'YEH' (yahweh), so I shabback and give God the praise!
dance like nobody's watching, and begin your declarations
grab your flags and wave them - running - a walking decoration
release to me your will and emotions - and loose yourself with I
follow me to the rivers of life - the streams that justify
let the flame for me burn uncontrollably - because the actions thereafter now are holy
my rib joined back to guard my heart to stay - only one climax to our story
our kisses will be unexplainable, for when we meet - we're lost and yet we are found
beautiful in every place that I've seeked - and I know what i found
heartfelt is only a small way to explain my longing - innermost
cause until now - I've longed for you to be back - back to your home.
let the ember of our souls - relax and roll
and turn both our hearts - into diamonds, rubies, and gold.
come!
O' lovely serene and good hearted virtuous help-meet
and stand by my side - completed - as the finished product to Jehovah-Nissi.
.s.incere.
Early 2009
The Harlem Renaissance
(5) Hip-hop and you don't stop -
Rocking to the beat that compresses, like cough drops
My jaw drops!
When small shops and mall cops distract my attention
Walking street corners then my call drops
I'm facing a symbol of ambiance
A descriptive picture
Of the Harlem Renaissance.
Prostrated by nine caryatids
Is a Steinway replica - Jazz music's apparatus.
Leftovers? - Never that...
A chance to expound? - I'll take it back...
Cause when I Look across 110th street
I embrace my past.
I'm reflecting off the sound of the brass pipes
From Cab Calloway, to Count Basie
That seemed like it was playing last night.
Even the prohibition couldn't silence your movement
From the poems to the expansion of culture
My body's in tuned with.
And it's marching to the beat of a different drum
Away from the 76ers diplomatic song
a self-worth manifestation.
This conception mastered the full - revelation
That harmonizes spirit - soul - and body.
(cause that's the key)
And so the playwrights live on
Through song and dance
And replenish our minds
When we join together again...
Simply clapping our hands.
.the harlem renaissance.
.marcus..christopher..hollinger
SPRING OF 2009
Rocking to the beat that compresses, like cough drops
My jaw drops!
When small shops and mall cops distract my attention
Walking street corners then my call drops
I'm facing a symbol of ambiance
A descriptive picture
Of the Harlem Renaissance.
Prostrated by nine caryatids
Is a Steinway replica - Jazz music's apparatus.
Leftovers? - Never that...
A chance to expound? - I'll take it back...
Cause when I Look across 110th street
I embrace my past.
I'm reflecting off the sound of the brass pipes
From Cab Calloway, to Count Basie
That seemed like it was playing last night.
Even the prohibition couldn't silence your movement
From the poems to the expansion of culture
My body's in tuned with.
And it's marching to the beat of a different drum
Away from the 76ers diplomatic song
a self-worth manifestation.
This conception mastered the full - revelation
That harmonizes spirit - soul - and body.
(cause that's the key)
And so the playwrights live on
Through song and dance
And replenish our minds
When we join together again...
Simply clapping our hands.
.the harlem renaissance.
.marcus..christopher..hollinger
SPRING OF 2009
Mind Power
(4) Tip-toeing through the sands of time, i issue a reproof of the conditions of the mind.
Issued by the false media and rhetorical politicians, sidewayz theologians, wicked wizards and math mathematicians.
My psyche evaluation had been corrupted by a nation - constructed by the foulest hating - which ends up with a medallion-ed plaintiff.
To fight against people like me, who's sick and tired of being lonely - who was convinced that nobody's gonna try to even hold me.
With reverse psychology in mind, the plaintiff enters the court office room - with the topic in mind to cause brain hurricanes and thought monsoons.
Rhetorically flinging words at me with an Oxford education, confusing the mess outta me, so i chain up in contemplation.
Am I cool - calm - and collective as these words provoke and stimulate my brain storms - suppose I grab the remote - and flip back to something wholesome but I find my way back to FOX News - with an action - obsessive compulsive.
Not addicted - but invited
Always curious - so i tried it
Internally - i tried to fight it
But i gotta address it - I can't hide it
The propaganda was fuel to my lustful compositions - of race and politics - two issues incredibly heinous.
To my neurological stimulative procession activities my inherited authoritative e gestures that i use to fight my enemies...
.mind power.
See im developing through favor - His words eviscerate like light sabers
pulling atoms apart - from the conformist to the cradle.
The conformist who's set in his ways of racism, bigotry, idol worship and institutionalized prisons.
The cradle where early life is nurtured and the innocent life form - is ultimately hurt less -
Miles and miles and MILES away from mourn.
As billions before me, I've laid in the post natal infant condition - a prerequisite for childhood where i learned the prohibitions.
But my embargo act of the rules taught before puberty - I pray breaks conceptional chains - and warrants to likewise come to the prostration and call His name.
The giver of life isn't man nor woman - the real soul bearer confides in an omnipotent trinity - that's now real to me.
My mind has shifted - reconducted a new truth - that I was never last and never forgotten - And everyday - seeks to renewal.
So a demon cant win cause im the champion a modern day Moses and Martin Luther King.
Who didn't have much to offer but his soul and service - And his life was the reciprocal, the opposite of worthless.cause we've surfaced the flood waters of "i cant do" - but by the renewal of the mind my hearts brand new.
No more mindful bad traffic - which is a bad habit - like back stabbing or concealing a ghat ratchet covered by the Teflon next to a hatchet.
So to Lucifer, i throw you a curve - and i know you cant catch it / cause your hiatus is eternal your forever perplexed kid.
He called - and I answered.
And then He released - and gave me the key, from this social prison where I wondered ,to you, how to speak.
I wondered how to keep a promise to the one that I loved most dearly, sincerely - praying - questioning if He can ever really hear me.
But the clarity is now - so I break the walls of inhibition.
And I'm now free to love, work and grow with a single hindrance.
.Inclined.
.Forgiven.
.Chosen.
.Set Free.
and then
.Decided.
.Worked.
.Trial.
.Rewarded.
and blessed...
blessed with -
.Mind Power.
.sincere
Sometime in 2008
Issued by the false media and rhetorical politicians, sidewayz theologians, wicked wizards and math mathematicians.
My psyche evaluation had been corrupted by a nation - constructed by the foulest hating - which ends up with a medallion-ed plaintiff.
To fight against people like me, who's sick and tired of being lonely - who was convinced that nobody's gonna try to even hold me.
With reverse psychology in mind, the plaintiff enters the court office room - with the topic in mind to cause brain hurricanes and thought monsoons.
Rhetorically flinging words at me with an Oxford education, confusing the mess outta me, so i chain up in contemplation.
Am I cool - calm - and collective as these words provoke and stimulate my brain storms - suppose I grab the remote - and flip back to something wholesome but I find my way back to FOX News - with an action - obsessive compulsive.
Not addicted - but invited
Always curious - so i tried it
Internally - i tried to fight it
But i gotta address it - I can't hide it
The propaganda was fuel to my lustful compositions - of race and politics - two issues incredibly heinous.
To my neurological stimulative procession activities my inherited authoritative e gestures that i use to fight my enemies...
.mind power.
See im developing through favor - His words eviscerate like light sabers
pulling atoms apart - from the conformist to the cradle.
The conformist who's set in his ways of racism, bigotry, idol worship and institutionalized prisons.
The cradle where early life is nurtured and the innocent life form - is ultimately hurt less -
Miles and miles and MILES away from mourn.
As billions before me, I've laid in the post natal infant condition - a prerequisite for childhood where i learned the prohibitions.
But my embargo act of the rules taught before puberty - I pray breaks conceptional chains - and warrants to likewise come to the prostration and call His name.
The giver of life isn't man nor woman - the real soul bearer confides in an omnipotent trinity - that's now real to me.
My mind has shifted - reconducted a new truth - that I was never last and never forgotten - And everyday - seeks to renewal.
So a demon cant win cause im the champion a modern day Moses and Martin Luther King.
Who didn't have much to offer but his soul and service - And his life was the reciprocal, the opposite of worthless.cause we've surfaced the flood waters of "i cant do" - but by the renewal of the mind my hearts brand new.
No more mindful bad traffic - which is a bad habit - like back stabbing or concealing a ghat ratchet covered by the Teflon next to a hatchet.
So to Lucifer, i throw you a curve - and i know you cant catch it / cause your hiatus is eternal your forever perplexed kid.
He called - and I answered.
And then He released - and gave me the key, from this social prison where I wondered ,to you, how to speak.
I wondered how to keep a promise to the one that I loved most dearly, sincerely - praying - questioning if He can ever really hear me.
But the clarity is now - so I break the walls of inhibition.
And I'm now free to love, work and grow with a single hindrance.
.Inclined.
.Forgiven.
.Chosen.
.Set Free.
and then
.Decided.
.Worked.
.Trial.
.Rewarded.
and blessed...
blessed with -
.Mind Power.
.sincere
Sometime in 2008
Gambian Princess
(3) Adopted the name of a slave ship as her first
And the last was from 'massa /
A Gambian princess sparked a revolution
For the conformity of the masses.
Sold as an insignificant piece of chattel
With only expectations to work /
Was this Gambian Princess - and the seller was masked from her worth.
His intentions were quite different than what the Lord had in mind /
He wanted to make boldness, and valor
A woman who could stand and fight!
And she stood the test of time
And was taught to read and rhyme
Admonishment from Latin, the Holy Bible -
And the hope of the divine.
After half a decade of learning
You took the feather to the paper
And put the literary techniques to work for you -
I can still taste it's remnant vapor.
Yet they challenged you again
And said "You can't be a true author!"
"Prove to us now you have the capacity of a Rhodes Scholar!"
So you stood in the judgment pew
And sang your heart like a canary
Bold as a lion -
A servant of the Son of Mary.
Even the commander and chief
At the spark of the Revolution
Said your writing's complete and solve -
And gives America the correct diplomatic transfusion.
Though you died young - And lost two of your children
And had a husband that fled..
We remember you as a patriarch of words unsaid...
Gambian Princess live in our memories - vividly -
And show us how to let the caged bird sing!
And understand that, to the table -
Everyone has something of value to bring.
South of Sierra Leone is your birthplace - area's were robbed here - stripped of it's diamond's
But we were given another precious jewel
That was brought in the right timing.
.Gambian Princess.
.Phillis Wheatley.
.marcus..christopher..hollinger.
SPRING OF 2009
And the last was from 'massa /
A Gambian princess sparked a revolution
For the conformity of the masses.
Sold as an insignificant piece of chattel
With only expectations to work /
Was this Gambian Princess - and the seller was masked from her worth.
His intentions were quite different than what the Lord had in mind /
He wanted to make boldness, and valor
A woman who could stand and fight!
And she stood the test of time
And was taught to read and rhyme
Admonishment from Latin, the Holy Bible -
And the hope of the divine.
After half a decade of learning
You took the feather to the paper
And put the literary techniques to work for you -
I can still taste it's remnant vapor.
Yet they challenged you again
And said "You can't be a true author!"
"Prove to us now you have the capacity of a Rhodes Scholar!"
So you stood in the judgment pew
And sang your heart like a canary
Bold as a lion -
A servant of the Son of Mary.
Even the commander and chief
At the spark of the Revolution
Said your writing's complete and solve -
And gives America the correct diplomatic transfusion.
Though you died young - And lost two of your children
And had a husband that fled..
We remember you as a patriarch of words unsaid...
Gambian Princess live in our memories - vividly -
And show us how to let the caged bird sing!
And understand that, to the table -
Everyone has something of value to bring.
South of Sierra Leone is your birthplace - area's were robbed here - stripped of it's diamond's
But we were given another precious jewel
That was brought in the right timing.
.Gambian Princess.
.Phillis Wheatley.
.marcus..christopher..hollinger.
SPRING OF 2009
Martin Luther King Jr. (a reluctant Hero)
(2) A reluctant hero is he - and i am him - and he is me
because spiritually we're the same being.
He talks when my hands sing..I'm envisioning the future great works, that right now are unseen.
Am i living a legacy of another man's dram or just moon walking skillfully through a passage of greens - blues - reds - oranges - yellows - violets of a rainbow that signifies peace in our existence.
An oil painting constructed marvelously thanks to Rembrandt - a masterpiece.
A work of art that truly took time -
and when the finished product is complete, heavenly light shines.
But how?
What was his story?
Where did he get this glory?
Were there mishaps or bad things?
A blood and guts story?
Who were the actors?
When did this change take place
And how did you portray love and over throw hate?
How did you stand taller than many other fortified places - and stay encouraged in the breeding ground of white supremacist racist's......
A reluctant hero is he and i am him - cause ever since God spoke my story begins.
Through examples you told me to go within, to judge a man's character - cause many of us is shady - we're gray - and our lights will dim.
Because we haven't chose sides, selfish with our ambitions - drugs money and lust undeniably common missions.
- but we chose the sane route - but i admire your perseverance you could have been killed everyday you stepped foot out the house
but you fought face to face with death and hate, and to this fire brought a still frost.
A reluctant hero is he and i am him
I'm living earthly promises - blessed beyond the benjamin's
I'm living what he said he saw
During a midnight hours dream,
I'm living free in a lifetime
of a multitude of dreams.
Thanks to you any man can rightly have an Afrocentric Queen
any race - any religion - everyone - every being.
O reluctant one who lead many to a new way of living and a new way of thinking,
Thank you for your help, and thank you for the consistent friendship -
cause forever our spirits our breed through kinship.
.s.incere.
Sometime in 2007-2008
because spiritually we're the same being.
He talks when my hands sing..I'm envisioning the future great works, that right now are unseen.
Am i living a legacy of another man's dram or just moon walking skillfully through a passage of greens - blues - reds - oranges - yellows - violets of a rainbow that signifies peace in our existence.
An oil painting constructed marvelously thanks to Rembrandt - a masterpiece.
A work of art that truly took time -
and when the finished product is complete, heavenly light shines.
But how?
What was his story?
Where did he get this glory?
Were there mishaps or bad things?
A blood and guts story?
Who were the actors?
When did this change take place
And how did you portray love and over throw hate?
How did you stand taller than many other fortified places - and stay encouraged in the breeding ground of white supremacist racist's......
A reluctant hero is he and i am him - cause ever since God spoke my story begins.
Through examples you told me to go within, to judge a man's character - cause many of us is shady - we're gray - and our lights will dim.
Because we haven't chose sides, selfish with our ambitions - drugs money and lust undeniably common missions.
- but we chose the sane route - but i admire your perseverance you could have been killed everyday you stepped foot out the house
but you fought face to face with death and hate, and to this fire brought a still frost.
A reluctant hero is he and i am him
I'm living earthly promises - blessed beyond the benjamin's
I'm living what he said he saw
During a midnight hours dream,
I'm living free in a lifetime
of a multitude of dreams.
Thanks to you any man can rightly have an Afrocentric Queen
any race - any religion - everyone - every being.
O reluctant one who lead many to a new way of living and a new way of thinking,
Thank you for your help, and thank you for the consistent friendship -
cause forever our spirits our breed through kinship.
.s.incere.
Sometime in 2007-2008
Unforgiveness (in the Mind of Langston Hughes)
(1)-so recently, i completed an African American Literature project, and the topic was Langston Hughes. Wonderful writer and i encourage some of you who have only heard about him to go and pick up some of his poetry and dig in and decipher his messages and colloquialisms. But this poem i wrote and recited in class, is an in depth summary of Hughes relationship with his father and how it played a role in his socialization process and his role in the Harlem Renaissance. This is my version of what i think was going through his head during the time, but of course, i had to put a modern twist on it with the use of merging hip-hop with common poetic literacy - enjoy!
*UN-Forgiveness*
See everybody's a critic
Or very well a bigot
I feel like I''m trapped - in the Chronicle's of Riddick
Solider of an unseen movement - the mind to be specific
I wanna take back what was stolen from me,
And put it in hieroglyphics
So you'll be forced to understand the black man pain i campaign 'bout
I'll speak in parables with a vernacular
That 'ill make your brain clout
=====
You don't deserve anything else from me
Nothing more nothing less
Than what I'm already giving you
'Cause your soul i detest!
You want me to live in a fabricated fantasy
Made up in your own mind
And my relief is entrapped by your canopy
Sometimes I wonder if you're wearing a white pillow case as well
'Cause you're a coward, a snake, a phony, a fake
A diabolical candidate
Of the catacombs of hell
=====
You're ashamed of your own color
And abandoned me to your mother
And left me to find my own way into this society
Not wanting to receive a brother
I don't even know who you are
Much less where you been
Robbed me from strength within
I never know where to start
=====
Because we share nothing but a name
And yet in this state
That was probable of never happening
because they try to theft our identities
Only for the reason of hate....
And where do I go at this rate!
I wanna make my footprints for madea
And live the life she wanted for me
Yet you question "Langston what 'life'?"
Sadly...you really have no idea
Being a fatherless child is starting a slack in my wrist
I wanna be a strong man
But I'm always lacking the gift...
=====
LORD WHY ME!
Spiritual poverty and soulish malnutrition
Is what my counterparts want to bring...
But I need a new nigga
For this black cloud to follow
'Cause while it's over me
It's too dark to see tomorrow
And so I weep for us both
Believing that the only TRUE judge will reconcile
The differences we have
And our separation reinforced by miles
But how can i be free
If i never forgive you?
Will i learn today?
Or will i secretly write through all of my works....
to be continued...
?
.s.incere.
Spring 2009
*UN-Forgiveness*
See everybody's a critic
Or very well a bigot
I feel like I''m trapped - in the Chronicle's of Riddick
Solider of an unseen movement - the mind to be specific
I wanna take back what was stolen from me,
And put it in hieroglyphics
So you'll be forced to understand the black man pain i campaign 'bout
I'll speak in parables with a vernacular
That 'ill make your brain clout
=====
You don't deserve anything else from me
Nothing more nothing less
Than what I'm already giving you
'Cause your soul i detest!
You want me to live in a fabricated fantasy
Made up in your own mind
And my relief is entrapped by your canopy
Sometimes I wonder if you're wearing a white pillow case as well
'Cause you're a coward, a snake, a phony, a fake
A diabolical candidate
Of the catacombs of hell
=====
You're ashamed of your own color
And abandoned me to your mother
And left me to find my own way into this society
Not wanting to receive a brother
I don't even know who you are
Much less where you been
Robbed me from strength within
I never know where to start
=====
Because we share nothing but a name
And yet in this state
That was probable of never happening
because they try to theft our identities
Only for the reason of hate....
And where do I go at this rate!
I wanna make my footprints for madea
And live the life she wanted for me
Yet you question "Langston what 'life'?"
Sadly...you really have no idea
Being a fatherless child is starting a slack in my wrist
I wanna be a strong man
But I'm always lacking the gift...
=====
LORD WHY ME!
Spiritual poverty and soulish malnutrition
Is what my counterparts want to bring...
But I need a new nigga
For this black cloud to follow
'Cause while it's over me
It's too dark to see tomorrow
And so I weep for us both
Believing that the only TRUE judge will reconcile
The differences we have
And our separation reinforced by miles
But how can i be free
If i never forgive you?
Will i learn today?
Or will i secretly write through all of my works....
to be continued...
?
.s.incere.
Spring 2009
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Desention Detention (end your beefs...)
Quick fast and a hurry
My emotions turn salty
Like over seasoned curry
Powders and mixtures of grim intentions
And misinterpreted scripture mentions
Social martyr
A silent lynching
In the closet alone
Dying slowly
Emotionally listless
A downward spiral from Hyrule's Castle
Falling face down along the silent waters of Dawson's Creek
I'm drowning
Unnoticed by my friends for nearly a week
And with words i can't express to you how much my soul feels discreet...
Then i awaken back the real world staring at the closet ajar
Doors missing, and i wont put them up until tomorrow
Or the next day
Or the next week
Or maybe even never
You decide it
Cause to another town I'll slip to in quiet
And not even acknowledge the fact that I'm leaving you empty handed
On your hearts story of me, and with fire scars
Branded you with
An improper perspective of a seeker of Jesus Christ
Instead I'm leaving you with a nice try plight on fight night
TKO
you loose i win
Again and again - in my own mind you can never beat me...
A slave to my own sin....
A type of confinement assignment
I've tried quenching my flinching
Of confidence in Biblical Science
But I'm in Desention Detention....
And i gotta leave
I gotta breathe
I gotta see
And i gotta be
All that i can be
I gotta stay connected to this tree
To true vine of Hope
The Hope of Glory
The Chief Corner Stone
The Lamb that was slain on my behalf
The Lord on the Throne
Christ Jesus
The best
Yes
The love that has to test
Your alliance with other lovers
His passion leads to Cardiac Arrest
He's undressed my insides
And laid me bare, miserable and naked
And allowed me to make my own messes
And for my worldviews to be shaken
All the while i was baking
Being put under various degrees of Fire
I tired to hide
He flattened my tires
Dismantled my breaks
And deflated my system of living G..
And simply told me...
To go and end my beef's
Even the one's that I think that hurt me first
You go up to 'em
And release the Love that sets captives free
Release life and blow on 'em...
So now I'm charged and amped
Lit hotter than some flint in a lamp
And back like Action Jackson
On spiritual high from Youth Camp
Saying to all that hate
All that can't forgive
All that hold grudges
All that look for advice from watching Madea
All of those with varying beefs
All that have ought against a certain demographic
All that wish death on their brothers, and tell 'em to go skip and play in some traffic
All that want to commit suicide
All that hate their pastors
And have idolized men of God, and only go hard after
Symbols and Depictions
Listen...
The Gospel is simple and absolute, the saving power of Grace in Jesus redeems us from trying to lie to ourselves that in our abilities lies thr truth and reconciliation that our soul needs
Please and do agree
That you can't live in harmony with anybody...
Until you end your beef's...
.fin.
My emotions turn salty
Like over seasoned curry
Powders and mixtures of grim intentions
And misinterpreted scripture mentions
Social martyr
A silent lynching
In the closet alone
Dying slowly
Emotionally listless
A downward spiral from Hyrule's Castle
Falling face down along the silent waters of Dawson's Creek
I'm drowning
Unnoticed by my friends for nearly a week
And with words i can't express to you how much my soul feels discreet...
Then i awaken back the real world staring at the closet ajar
Doors missing, and i wont put them up until tomorrow
Or the next day
Or the next week
Or maybe even never
You decide it
Cause to another town I'll slip to in quiet
And not even acknowledge the fact that I'm leaving you empty handed
On your hearts story of me, and with fire scars
Branded you with
An improper perspective of a seeker of Jesus Christ
Instead I'm leaving you with a nice try plight on fight night
TKO
you loose i win
Again and again - in my own mind you can never beat me...
A slave to my own sin....
A type of confinement assignment
I've tried quenching my flinching
Of confidence in Biblical Science
But I'm in Desention Detention....
And i gotta leave
I gotta breathe
I gotta see
And i gotta be
All that i can be
I gotta stay connected to this tree
To true vine of Hope
The Hope of Glory
The Chief Corner Stone
The Lamb that was slain on my behalf
The Lord on the Throne
Christ Jesus
The best
Yes
The love that has to test
Your alliance with other lovers
His passion leads to Cardiac Arrest
He's undressed my insides
And laid me bare, miserable and naked
And allowed me to make my own messes
And for my worldviews to be shaken
All the while i was baking
Being put under various degrees of Fire
I tired to hide
He flattened my tires
Dismantled my breaks
And deflated my system of living G..
And simply told me...
To go and end my beef's
Even the one's that I think that hurt me first
You go up to 'em
And release the Love that sets captives free
Release life and blow on 'em...
So now I'm charged and amped
Lit hotter than some flint in a lamp
And back like Action Jackson
On spiritual high from Youth Camp
Saying to all that hate
All that can't forgive
All that hold grudges
All that look for advice from watching Madea
All of those with varying beefs
All that have ought against a certain demographic
All that wish death on their brothers, and tell 'em to go skip and play in some traffic
All that want to commit suicide
All that hate their pastors
And have idolized men of God, and only go hard after
Symbols and Depictions
Listen...
The Gospel is simple and absolute, the saving power of Grace in Jesus redeems us from trying to lie to ourselves that in our abilities lies thr truth and reconciliation that our soul needs
Please and do agree
That you can't live in harmony with anybody...
Until you end your beef's...
.fin.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
.mixed feelings.
only a tumbling ocean
can describe my current range of emotion
im sick from life's potion
but ill tattoo my face
with facade's potent lotions
so you wont have to deal with what im feeling
you won't have to burden yourself
with my psychological condition
im like Michelangelo's depiction
of Adam reaching for His intuition
but im stuck in a portrait
standing still in my position
against my will, im well-wishing
and i fell when grace was given
im disconnected from my home base
stranded on an island
where the natives chase me night and day
so to cope ive gone under-cover
ive adopted their customs
ive molded my will to theirs
their burdens i now have
and dispositions i must share
ive traded what i thought i knew
for the powers of this age
i talk like they talk
and walk around in a prisoners shame
im a POW-U
a Prisoner of Words Unsaid
but they don't seem to care
since i got their mark on my head
so as far as their concerned
im just like 'em
but underneath im fighting
a compromised heart
that's married strife
and
all kinds of foul play
and hardships
my love tastes like hard chips
im stone cold
like frozen cartilage of a narcissist
im stiff necked
and mad at the world
i feel left for dead
and gasping for my last breathe
im sweating bullets
wondering if ill pass the test
but in this tribe
im dead already
cause before i came in
i had a suicide letter written and signed
they knew the whole time what i was about
cause i couldn't fight my hearts tugging
no matter how much i try to lie to myself
i was always struggling
muzzling my desperate calls under my release of CO2
can describe my current range of emotion
im sick from life's potion
but ill tattoo my face
with facade's potent lotions
so you wont have to deal with what im feeling
you won't have to burden yourself
with my psychological condition
im like Michelangelo's depiction
of Adam reaching for His intuition
but im stuck in a portrait
standing still in my position
against my will, im well-wishing
and i fell when grace was given
im disconnected from my home base
stranded on an island
where the natives chase me night and day
so to cope ive gone under-cover
ive adopted their customs
ive molded my will to theirs
their burdens i now have
and dispositions i must share
ive traded what i thought i knew
for the powers of this age
i talk like they talk
and walk around in a prisoners shame
im a POW-U
a Prisoner of Words Unsaid
but they don't seem to care
since i got their mark on my head
so as far as their concerned
im just like 'em
but underneath im fighting
a compromised heart
that's married strife
and
all kinds of foul play
and hardships
my love tastes like hard chips
im stone cold
like frozen cartilage of a narcissist
im stiff necked
and mad at the world
i feel left for dead
and gasping for my last breathe
im sweating bullets
wondering if ill pass the test
but in this tribe
im dead already
cause before i came in
i had a suicide letter written and signed
they knew the whole time what i was about
cause i couldn't fight my hearts tugging
no matter how much i try to lie to myself
i was always struggling
muzzling my desperate calls under my release of CO2
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Daymares
I can't -
Help but see 'em
Distracted by black mask-kess
Road to Damascus
A rope to a pastor
I have to ask if
Was I really made to see this?
My stomach turns as I'm being entertained by demons
They fight my internals
Leaving me
Disconcerted
With open wounds the size of crop circles
Some of you heard this
Word
Once before
They sleeping at your door
They smell your blood shed
Odor comes from open sores
Like sharks they can smell your wounds from a mile away
You can't dodge these monsoons of thoughts
'Cause when you cry, they stay
They watch over you like the killer in the tale-tell heart
They never can be defeated
Never having strength depleted
Infamous and eternal
Internal rockin' a thermal
Around their fiery furnace of a heart
Looks more like an upside down cross
In the pit under a pendulum
A boiling pot of obstruction and misused justice
Lies that are spontaneously combusted
With a spear that's been thrusted
Down the center
While a cauldron topples over
You hear the muffled cries of a broken sinner
Your heart breaks
His anguish runs deeper than oceans bottoms
Every moan and every wail
Brings back the reality of Gomorrah and Sodom
His loud cries and vocal strains
Repeatedly barricade your rib cage
He's trapped, and locked in a cell of torment
A dying slave
With no wisdom guiding you, you reach out to grab his burning hand
But as you get closer, his face is still intact as a man
Fully recognizing his complexion
You pause in horror
And look back again
As if a ghost has been seen
it's more clearer
But the fear of seeing His agony
Only shows to you a mirror...
Help but see 'em
Distracted by black mask-kess
Road to Damascus
A rope to a pastor
I have to ask if
Was I really made to see this?
My stomach turns as I'm being entertained by demons
They fight my internals
Leaving me
Disconcerted
With open wounds the size of crop circles
Some of you heard this
Word
Once before
They sleeping at your door
They smell your blood shed
Odor comes from open sores
Like sharks they can smell your wounds from a mile away
You can't dodge these monsoons of thoughts
'Cause when you cry, they stay
They watch over you like the killer in the tale-tell heart
They never can be defeated
Never having strength depleted
Infamous and eternal
Internal rockin' a thermal
Around their fiery furnace of a heart
Looks more like an upside down cross
In the pit under a pendulum
A boiling pot of obstruction and misused justice
Lies that are spontaneously combusted
With a spear that's been thrusted
Down the center
While a cauldron topples over
You hear the muffled cries of a broken sinner
Your heart breaks
His anguish runs deeper than oceans bottoms
Every moan and every wail
Brings back the reality of Gomorrah and Sodom
His loud cries and vocal strains
Repeatedly barricade your rib cage
He's trapped, and locked in a cell of torment
A dying slave
With no wisdom guiding you, you reach out to grab his burning hand
But as you get closer, his face is still intact as a man
Fully recognizing his complexion
You pause in horror
And look back again
As if a ghost has been seen
it's more clearer
But the fear of seeing His agony
Only shows to you a mirror...
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
The Savior Who Reigns
(.verse 1.)
See I'm lacking the vernacular
To adequately capture
His emaculate stature
And His love for Mary Magdalene
But still i grab this torch
And use His word as a lit match and then
Attempt to make an accurate depiction of His majesty
I'm glad it's He
That created the sun, moon, and stars
Who made a choice
That's actually
Broken these chains and melted these bars
Of religion and trepidation
Self-Righteousness
The bed of Satan
Instead of waiting
He struck both sides of my mattress
With a mere statement
Remodeled the whole house
And made the cornerstone Christ Jesus
Evaluated my situation
And gave me the word that Paul spoke to the Galatians And the Ephesians....
Concerning the fruits of the spirit
Christian conduct and a life of worship
Why He died on my behalf
And my life to be in His surplus
He disrupted my circus
With a verse of true controversy
and said 'Nobody fears God..'
In listening it started to hurt me
Urking and Lurking in my hearts file cabinets and archives
Was the never ending truth
Of the Symphony of Heaven
HALLELUJAH!
OUR GOD'S ALIVE!
He's alive and iridescent
Undispuatble and irrefutable
Fully suitable to fit work
In a hard heart that seems un-do-able
I got a passion in the Son of Man
And a passion in His words
Passion that burns for His hands to grasp
My hearts every turn
And twist
And He remains anonymous
But I know him by His gift
For he greeted me with a kiss
And with obedience I'll honor Him.
(.hook.)
All praise to the name
Of the Savior who reigns
He's taken our blame
And embraced all our shame
He's raised from the grave
So His fame we proclaim
Salvation by grace
Through faith in His name!
(.verse 2.)
The most prolific martyr
The who (who's) dwelling in unapproachable light
The God man Jesus Christ
His mandate repent and follow:
The steps of the elect
And wear His words on your chest and neck
Denounce the sin
And to lawlessness
Forever be vexed
His words holy and perfect
And His breathe like summer winds
He's the blessing without the cursing
And the one who's coming again!
He's kinda like
Dy-na-mite
The messiah TYPE A
And ain't chemical concoction
reciprocating His Holy name!
He's the lime-light of Heaven
And the laminin of the Galaxy
He's suspending the earth
By the sound of His voice
But He close enough to say that He's proud of me
SO I'LL SAY IT LOUD
JESUS!
THAT'S RIGHT I SAID IT
JESUS!
J-E-S.U.S
The best
Alpha and Omega
His touches leads to cardiac arrest
Captivating the inner mane
while putting a hold on bodily functions
Freezing time to purge iniquity
From every submitting and willing persons
with an iron rod
He's sworn to bash the face of wicked mischievousness spirits
But at the same time
He blesses your soul...
Speaking to you via the Fathers Sacred and Holy lyrics...
(.hook.)
(.repeat.)
(.fin.)
See I'm lacking the vernacular
To adequately capture
His emaculate stature
And His love for Mary Magdalene
But still i grab this torch
And use His word as a lit match and then
Attempt to make an accurate depiction of His majesty
I'm glad it's He
That created the sun, moon, and stars
Who made a choice
That's actually
Broken these chains and melted these bars
Of religion and trepidation
Self-Righteousness
The bed of Satan
Instead of waiting
He struck both sides of my mattress
With a mere statement
Remodeled the whole house
And made the cornerstone Christ Jesus
Evaluated my situation
And gave me the word that Paul spoke to the Galatians And the Ephesians....
Concerning the fruits of the spirit
Christian conduct and a life of worship
Why He died on my behalf
And my life to be in His surplus
He disrupted my circus
With a verse of true controversy
and said 'Nobody fears God..'
In listening it started to hurt me
Urking and Lurking in my hearts file cabinets and archives
Was the never ending truth
Of the Symphony of Heaven
HALLELUJAH!
OUR GOD'S ALIVE!
He's alive and iridescent
Undispuatble and irrefutable
Fully suitable to fit work
In a hard heart that seems un-do-able
I got a passion in the Son of Man
And a passion in His words
Passion that burns for His hands to grasp
My hearts every turn
And twist
And He remains anonymous
But I know him by His gift
For he greeted me with a kiss
And with obedience I'll honor Him.
(.hook.)
All praise to the name
Of the Savior who reigns
He's taken our blame
And embraced all our shame
He's raised from the grave
So His fame we proclaim
Salvation by grace
Through faith in His name!
(.verse 2.)
The most prolific martyr
The who (who's) dwelling in unapproachable light
The God man Jesus Christ
His mandate repent and follow:
The steps of the elect
And wear His words on your chest and neck
Denounce the sin
And to lawlessness
Forever be vexed
His words holy and perfect
And His breathe like summer winds
He's the blessing without the cursing
And the one who's coming again!
He's kinda like
Dy-na-mite
The messiah TYPE A
And ain't chemical concoction
reciprocating His Holy name!
He's the lime-light of Heaven
And the laminin of the Galaxy
He's suspending the earth
By the sound of His voice
But He close enough to say that He's proud of me
SO I'LL SAY IT LOUD
JESUS!
THAT'S RIGHT I SAID IT
JESUS!
J-E-S.U.S
The best
Alpha and Omega
His touches leads to cardiac arrest
Captivating the inner mane
while putting a hold on bodily functions
Freezing time to purge iniquity
From every submitting and willing persons
with an iron rod
He's sworn to bash the face of wicked mischievousness spirits
But at the same time
He blesses your soul...
Speaking to you via the Fathers Sacred and Holy lyrics...
(.hook.)
(.repeat.)
(.fin.)
Thursday, March 3, 2011
(A Cold Heart of Stone) Bitterness Manifested into Selfishness
I don't even know why i feel this way
I feel as if i could hate you for the rest of my life
I get convinced that my dispositions are right - but its strife
That I'm fueled by, amped up to yell in your face
And tell you to like you told me, to go Hell and leave this place
I'm angry at your actions and im sick of fighting you internally
Every time i see your face my heart involuntarily starts to bleed
But i need you to listen
For once, tune your ears and understand me
Because i can't live like this and continue to call it family
I cant talk to you without wanting to make you pay for all the wrong things you've done
That you did without thinking, and you done them to a son
For fun, maybe, but why then do i cry like a new born baby
Who's neglected but your choice weapon of selfishness, im left perplex'ted
I feel naked and unusual or an unusable tool
Im ostracized outside the city like a Samaritan
Jerusalem's fool
Im unprotected and ill-witted
Unequipped in a world of monsters
But ive grown to realize that you're one of them
A thought that i didn't conjure - up
Or think on my own, its the produce of your own fore thoughts
Its the fruit of your labor
But you walk around like a hardwired robot
Being swayed by popular cultures trapeze of endless twirls and circles
You follow anything that keeps you comfortable
A run from being exposed
and its sickens me!
Ive hated myself because you seemingly didn't want me
Ive wanted to die and be forgotten
And with your actions you said, " Go ahead.."
My condition is smitten, but lost and confused
Tossed and abused
Raped and molested
Festering and not connected
Head ached and falsely concepted
Maliced and biased
Forgetful and out of time
And
A liar without compliance
Im a hardcore case of opportunity
I want unity
Only if it works for my good in the end
And my immunity
You won't speak I'll do more devious
I'll use the media to upset your precepts and tell you wants next!
You can't get aggressive enough to stop me
I'll pop 3 with a prime NRA grip of choice
And make noise that men or war hate hearing
Yet are favorite toys for little boys
Im not scared anymore, im fearless
And dont try and stop me
Ill retaliate with indignance that's filled with
Retribution and contaminated pen ship
I should mention that I can grow up on my own
Don't call me on the phone
To try and ask how im doing
Eventually you start calling me away, shooing...
I get angry till im blue in the face
Smurfed up with contusions and abased
Called your disgrace
And left for dead, and locked up into another place
I dont even know who i am - or what i culd be - or what ive become
I flying by the seat of my pants
In these mixed world
But you brought me here and gave me nothing
Tried to hope that i would figure out on my own
And i have and ive hated you for it
'Cause i wake up, only to get hit by a forklift
and my dreams are constantly shattered
And i can't ignore it like you can
I just wish that you would love me
Whatever your battling, i wish you would give in
and come and hug me
I wish my mother felt comfortable with you
I wish you 2 would grow together
and die to each others rights and wishes
and become interdependent
But you're withheld and withdrawn
Holding it in and somethings wrong
And you refuse to talk about it
That's why i write this song.....
Because im sick of the silence
I wanna break free from my depression
Cause im in step with thoughts of topless females for my soulish medicine
Since 2008 til 2010
I acted out my debauchery and blatantly committed sin
Ive been boxed up and trapped, chocking on lies and all the while
No one questioned my integrity, or challenged what was behind my smile
I wondering why do i even have to cry like this
WHY!
Why must i have to feel this silent pain that i can't tell to anyone
Why am i so alone
Why is there no person in my life that's willing to just sit and listen
WHY
Why must i go on lie this
Why do you still not care?
Why do i feel like you hate me?
Why do i feel like i hate you?
Why is there no truth?
and only compromise
Why has my heart, that i thought was always pliable and soft, turned into a breeding ground for unforgiveness and solitary confinement?
...
I feel as if i could hate you for the rest of my life
I get convinced that my dispositions are right - but its strife
That I'm fueled by, amped up to yell in your face
And tell you to like you told me, to go Hell and leave this place
I'm angry at your actions and im sick of fighting you internally
Every time i see your face my heart involuntarily starts to bleed
But i need you to listen
For once, tune your ears and understand me
Because i can't live like this and continue to call it family
I cant talk to you without wanting to make you pay for all the wrong things you've done
That you did without thinking, and you done them to a son
For fun, maybe, but why then do i cry like a new born baby
Who's neglected but your choice weapon of selfishness, im left perplex'ted
I feel naked and unusual or an unusable tool
Im ostracized outside the city like a Samaritan
Jerusalem's fool
Im unprotected and ill-witted
Unequipped in a world of monsters
But ive grown to realize that you're one of them
A thought that i didn't conjure - up
Or think on my own, its the produce of your own fore thoughts
Its the fruit of your labor
But you walk around like a hardwired robot
Being swayed by popular cultures trapeze of endless twirls and circles
You follow anything that keeps you comfortable
A run from being exposed
and its sickens me!
Ive hated myself because you seemingly didn't want me
Ive wanted to die and be forgotten
And with your actions you said, " Go ahead.."
My condition is smitten, but lost and confused
Tossed and abused
Raped and molested
Festering and not connected
Head ached and falsely concepted
Maliced and biased
Forgetful and out of time
And
A liar without compliance
Im a hardcore case of opportunity
I want unity
Only if it works for my good in the end
And my immunity
You won't speak I'll do more devious
I'll use the media to upset your precepts and tell you wants next!
You can't get aggressive enough to stop me
I'll pop 3 with a prime NRA grip of choice
And make noise that men or war hate hearing
Yet are favorite toys for little boys
Im not scared anymore, im fearless
And dont try and stop me
Ill retaliate with indignance that's filled with
Retribution and contaminated pen ship
I should mention that I can grow up on my own
Don't call me on the phone
To try and ask how im doing
Eventually you start calling me away, shooing...
I get angry till im blue in the face
Smurfed up with contusions and abased
Called your disgrace
And left for dead, and locked up into another place
I dont even know who i am - or what i culd be - or what ive become
I flying by the seat of my pants
In these mixed world
But you brought me here and gave me nothing
Tried to hope that i would figure out on my own
And i have and ive hated you for it
'Cause i wake up, only to get hit by a forklift
and my dreams are constantly shattered
And i can't ignore it like you can
I just wish that you would love me
Whatever your battling, i wish you would give in
and come and hug me
I wish my mother felt comfortable with you
I wish you 2 would grow together
and die to each others rights and wishes
and become interdependent
But you're withheld and withdrawn
Holding it in and somethings wrong
And you refuse to talk about it
That's why i write this song.....
Because im sick of the silence
I wanna break free from my depression
Cause im in step with thoughts of topless females for my soulish medicine
Since 2008 til 2010
I acted out my debauchery and blatantly committed sin
Ive been boxed up and trapped, chocking on lies and all the while
No one questioned my integrity, or challenged what was behind my smile
I wondering why do i even have to cry like this
WHY!
Why must i have to feel this silent pain that i can't tell to anyone
Why am i so alone
Why is there no person in my life that's willing to just sit and listen
WHY
Why must i go on lie this
Why do you still not care?
Why do i feel like you hate me?
Why do i feel like i hate you?
Why is there no truth?
and only compromise
Why has my heart, that i thought was always pliable and soft, turned into a breeding ground for unforgiveness and solitary confinement?
...
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
A Marriage Proposal to Wisdom
With all that i can say, i say to you that you are lovely
Your closer than a breastplate in battle
Your secure to me like the equestrian's saddle
Your smile makes me feel like nothing else in the world is left to live for
And i wanna give my all to you, both now and forever more
I wanna decorate you like a promise that's made from pure intentions
While supplying a small piece our your never ending joy - and i should mention
That your complete and unique
With the 'good news' and beautiful feet
Sincere and humble, meek
And peachy beige colored cheeks
With you my inner-man is relaxin'
And I'm partnered with an Anglo-Saxon
So I'm sorry miss Jackson
But your unappropriated euphemisms won't steal me from this love
That was given to me personally - from heaven's up above
My eyes could only recognize outwardly beauty
But truly - now - i do agree
That was unruly and very shallow of me
I was more thin, inwardly, than Vidal Sassoon Models
And changed direction without warning like a sick turkey's waddle
I gobble gobbled at random antics
And swallowed the varying ideologies that stormed the stage at the Apollo
After anything i would follow - a walking slave to semantics
When my parish broke up - i was choked up - then i was woke up
Bodily systems dry and decrepit like i had been doped up
Resolutions was simple, blow off the dust and kick the bottles
Change your clothes, take this staff - immediately i then followed
And He lead me to the truth again - then He lead me back to you
Then he reintroduced an agreement that i hid in the caboose
It was you!
I ran from the undying fact that i loved you
I was scared that if i told you that you would look at me aloofed
And claim that my hearts turning and twisting was just an early life's missing
And couldn't be resurrected - So I'm not worth to listening
But I've never stopped my hearts beat for you
I've never drawn away
I've never decided to not love you
I've never gone astray
In fact the females after you were only makeshift - types
And didn't suffice 'sis
This is the reason why I've lived in and out of identity crisis
'Cause I've interceded for a wife
Who's quite nice like Mike Tys - on fight night - dislikes strife - who likes life - and high kites
I've never forced a feeling that I'm having now today
And I've never felt like you've made me feel - and with all i have to say
I call you the Wisdom that's directed me out of the streets of perversion - the silence that's low key - and is constantly working
It's always searching - and it found me at 17 years old
And 6 years later my increasing zeal has reciprocated cold
I see Psaltery in my destiny
A rare future that's ahead of me
But I'll trade it all back.... if i cant have you next to me....
Because you're something like the missing link between my decisions and my heart cries
My aspirations and admonitions are apprehended by Heavenly aesthetics
Bomb-boarded by boisterous banging from doubled-bass strings that's not pathetic
My hearts constantly copycatting the calligraphy of cunning Cupids
That search for love and sometimes get called by others stupid
Dropping to my knees by your touch - I'm definitely dumb-founded
That a deity prescribed your description to fit my position
All day to you I'll sit and listen
Elegant are your ways to me as i sit and day dream about your resiliency to the World's precepts and manners - you're the key
And how you pattern your life after a queen
I'll be your king
And the Lord will be pleased
With the music the we bring
You're truth Ruth!
And wouldn't have you any other way,
I'm praying
"Will you wed me - please say yes!"
That's what my heart has to say.
f.in.
Your closer than a breastplate in battle
Your secure to me like the equestrian's saddle
Your smile makes me feel like nothing else in the world is left to live for
And i wanna give my all to you, both now and forever more
I wanna decorate you like a promise that's made from pure intentions
While supplying a small piece our your never ending joy - and i should mention
That your complete and unique
With the 'good news' and beautiful feet
Sincere and humble, meek
And peachy beige colored cheeks
With you my inner-man is relaxin'
And I'm partnered with an Anglo-Saxon
So I'm sorry miss Jackson
But your unappropriated euphemisms won't steal me from this love
That was given to me personally - from heaven's up above
My eyes could only recognize outwardly beauty
But truly - now - i do agree
That was unruly and very shallow of me
I was more thin, inwardly, than Vidal Sassoon Models
And changed direction without warning like a sick turkey's waddle
I gobble gobbled at random antics
And swallowed the varying ideologies that stormed the stage at the Apollo
After anything i would follow - a walking slave to semantics
When my parish broke up - i was choked up - then i was woke up
Bodily systems dry and decrepit like i had been doped up
Resolutions was simple, blow off the dust and kick the bottles
Change your clothes, take this staff - immediately i then followed
And He lead me to the truth again - then He lead me back to you
Then he reintroduced an agreement that i hid in the caboose
It was you!
I ran from the undying fact that i loved you
I was scared that if i told you that you would look at me aloofed
And claim that my hearts turning and twisting was just an early life's missing
And couldn't be resurrected - So I'm not worth to listening
But I've never stopped my hearts beat for you
I've never drawn away
I've never decided to not love you
I've never gone astray
In fact the females after you were only makeshift - types
And didn't suffice 'sis
This is the reason why I've lived in and out of identity crisis
'Cause I've interceded for a wife
Who's quite nice like Mike Tys - on fight night - dislikes strife - who likes life - and high kites
I've never forced a feeling that I'm having now today
And I've never felt like you've made me feel - and with all i have to say
I call you the Wisdom that's directed me out of the streets of perversion - the silence that's low key - and is constantly working
It's always searching - and it found me at 17 years old
And 6 years later my increasing zeal has reciprocated cold
I see Psaltery in my destiny
A rare future that's ahead of me
But I'll trade it all back.... if i cant have you next to me....
Because you're something like the missing link between my decisions and my heart cries
My aspirations and admonitions are apprehended by Heavenly aesthetics
Bomb-boarded by boisterous banging from doubled-bass strings that's not pathetic
My hearts constantly copycatting the calligraphy of cunning Cupids
That search for love and sometimes get called by others stupid
Dropping to my knees by your touch - I'm definitely dumb-founded
That a deity prescribed your description to fit my position
All day to you I'll sit and listen
Elegant are your ways to me as i sit and day dream about your resiliency to the World's precepts and manners - you're the key
And how you pattern your life after a queen
I'll be your king
And the Lord will be pleased
With the music the we bring
You're truth Ruth!
And wouldn't have you any other way,
I'm praying
"Will you wed me - please say yes!"
That's what my heart has to say.
f.in.
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